WK 11: Blas Vs Knoxville. - Knox Wins

http://rapbattles.com/forum/SOTW/SOT...W22-1-2(3).png
Punches due Thursday
Voting ends on Sunday

You know the rules, if not, refer to the rule thread.


@Blas
@KnoXville.

Let’s Fkn Get It!

Hello. I am going to spit hot fire.

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Faggot you've been low tier before christ, he's not so good
This dickrider is ALWAYS losing this battle - *Knox on wood*

I’ll pull up while ur praying get folded up in his yoga pose,
“Blasphemy, is a knock out” & That’s what He received after the broken nose.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Blas

Hello. I am going to spit hot fire.

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Faggot you've been low tier before christ, he's not so good
This dickrider is ALWAYS losing this battle - *Knox on wood*

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when you use a dash or em dash ... the words on either side have to mirror.. a semi colon is what you should have used... which describes the meaning of what is before it

Quote:

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Use a semicolon to join two related independent clauses in place of a comma and a coordinating conjunction (and, but, or, nor, for, so, yet). Make sure when you use the semicolon that the connection between the two independent clauses is clear without the coordinating conjunction.

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Quote:

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The difference between an em-dash and a semicolon is the length and purpose of the pause it creates. An em-dash isolates the idea that follows; a semicolon combines two ideas into one. The best way to determine if you can use an em-dash or a semicolon is to try them both out in your sentence, then read it aloud.

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then you said "this battle" instead of "in battles"... so it didnt make much sense... though the "knock on wood" name play was fresh and dope.. it could have better use if you were stating that he was getting beat up in some way.... just saying d-rider one time is not enough glue to link with Knox on wood.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by KnoXville.

I’ll pull up while ur praying get folded up in his yoga pose,
“Blasphemy, is a knock out” & That’s what He received after the broken nose.

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this is not good enough to be a double entendre ..."blas for me" and where... "is a knock out" and whatelse ... just could have been better.. and linked to yoga in some way

b/c Blas had better wordplay even with the grammar issue .. he gets my vote


v/blas

love blas concept but not a huge fan of the delivery.

blasphemy like blast for me? i mean ive seen it used before and it can work but the wording hurt you here in my opinion.

diggin blas more here

/blas

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ohh shit tis blas for me is a knockout. wish it worked both ways. this makes it a lot closer though. blas is almost saying knox on wood as if he needs luck to win though.

I'm sorry guys id like to change my vote to knox

v/ knox

Hmmmmmm this is close. Took me a while to work out the blasphemy word play. Probably because it doesn’t work both ways unless you were referring to “god bless you” some people say after they sneeze to connect it with the nose angle? Bit of a reach if so. Boss’ was a bit basic and knox on wood was a good concept but didn’t hit hard as you associate that with superstition and trying to avoid bad luck which detracted from the confident swagger a punchline should have.
V/ knox

v/knox

knox on wood in this case doesn't work as a double entendre, or doesn't work well. if so you would be saying that you are worried about knox beating you, as well as him riding dick. I knox did enough here to make a solid punch that seemed like a diss.

Blas had a decent punch. The set up doesn't hold true, given that Christ was a faggot well before Knox allegedly was. Think the "he's not so good" set up rhyme was a bit lazy. The dickrider / Knox on wood works well, although it does imply you're hopeful about winning which is obviously the point of competing but is also a bit uncool to say. I'm not sure if that's well explained, I mean it's cooler to say "I don't give a fuck" than "I am hopeful of victory" in a battle, worked well enough here though.

I thought the blasphemy/praying link was ok, the only issues would be that I've seen the Blasphemy wordplay before which in fairness you may not have. Ending with the broken nose component is where I think it separates because it doesn't tie back in clearly enough, I'd guess you had the image in your mind of how you knocked him out while praying which resulted in a broken nose but it isn't conveyed. Close battle.

Vote Blas

Pretty close here. Honestly Ive went back in forth on this. Two concepts with great potential. But both have minor issues in terms of execution/wording that prevent them from making maximum impact. Its pretty close to a tie, honestly. But Im going to go with the ever so slightly harder hit.

Vote - Knox

I’m not digging Blas execution on this one.. concept is there but it felll bland to me. Knox’s wasn’t amusing either but it was more effective to me. I’m leaning with Knox here

Knox wins 5-2.