^Originally Posted by 2hot2handle
So he did. Weak.
^
So he did. Weak.
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IJL: Because 'NAMBLA' was already taken.
I daresay I like Johnnys a bit better as well. I guess it was just the approach he took to it. The way he developed his storyline just seemed to appeal to me more. Troop don't get me wrong, your piece was great, but I have seen that approach before, and it just seemed a little on the unoriginal side. Props to both of you, and Troop your constantly elevating, which is a great thing.
Vote/ Johnny.
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Johnny - Win
Better imagery more solidly put together verse with better rhyme scheme and came with more emotion and stronger foundation to his piece.
Troop - Lose
Your drop was also nice you came with the imagery and the emotion but your rhyme scheme and foundation of the verse as a whole was not as solid.
ScytsoPhrenia
CrazyDope
Put down the pebbles in my hand, climbed a ladder, put a brick right through your window.
"You're gonna hear me out." Yeah, hear me out on this!
Johnny - You weren't as creative as i expected man,i know you can do much better.I liked your structure,i would've suited a more deeper aproach,grimer.But still i liked it this way,your imagery was nice.Your flow was on point.Liked the rhymescheme too.As people said,this wasn't your best work,but this was still good.
Troop - I can't say i liked your storyline too much,nothing drew me in.You just didn't have the right aproach...I would've liked a deeper,psychological aproach with more emotion to draw me in.You kinda lacked in imagery and metaphorical content.Your wordchoices weren't the best sometimes either.Your flow was ok,and i liked your rhymescheme in some parts(it showed potential,but you didn't carry on with it as i would've liked it).Your vocab was pretty basic.Good vocab is not for the eye,you should implement good vocab to express some emotions or things you couldn't express either.Good voacb with good wordchoices really helps your imagery and emotion.Anyway this was a nice read.
Johnny won this.He just came more experienced in flow,rhymescheme,imagery.Sorry Troop...
v/Johnny
Def Poets Society
Johnny 6-feet WINS (4-1)
Troop LOSES (3-2)
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