Storms A Brewin

[MiCsYcKlE]

Their pain is unseen in the metabolic machine
With wings too white for our ordinary night
We are chosen as the few righteouses frozen
To guard the fate from all those who hate
We are gods fighting against all odds
That we may win and be all free from sin
So I tell the truth of bone and tooth:

Today is the last in the recorded war of nevermore as the light slips away
A trumpets blast damming all past of this dreaded last day
Red is mixed with white as the once loved angels join the fight against those they hate
By now they should have somehow seen what is coming to pass that they have shut the gate
As the blood of fallen angels stain the grass men and angel are one
And so heaven can wait, we know it’s to late as we see the setting sun
A silent prayer to the god that is no longer there is said by those still alive
For love for life for every man and wife still we strive
Where is man without a heaven above to shout all their pain?
Steel flies as the heaven cries with a blood rain
And one man’s head looks to the dead and turns to say
“This is our decree that we will be free from the judgment this way
That we will not go silently into the darkness without a fight against the light that blinds all those foolish enough to look
We are man, we are legion, let us fight in every region for what our god took
Let us give so children might live our life and our mind
Hope is left behind as god declares war on the city of the blind

[Split-eyez]

aight I liked this piece... it's not a regular subject and that makes it interesting.
Your beginning spoke to me, so I just had to read further, where you with your words, kept my interest.

"Let us give so children might live our life and our mind"

I thought you were going to give some hopefull line right there, but as it seems, the last line came out negative. I kinda liked that...
I'd give this piece a 9/10
really nice work, great flow, vocab, wordplay
keep it up

peace

[Varentao]

This was a bit of an epic. At least, it was written in an epic way. I felt maybe could've expanded it further. But nonetheless...

...imagery was powerful and resounding. Putting it all together in a rofound and well executed manner. Bringing forward the motion of ignorance, and how it can be used in the most extreme forms. And this being one of the most extreme of them all. Which made it more effective. Ignorance, the machine that churns it, what happens and the aftermath...

Liked a lot.

..resp...