The Burgalry [ft Truth Iscariot]

[Endeva.]

DEV in Bold
Truth in Italic

The Burgalry

Creepin, I sneak in deep between the greenery...
Leaping the wall with my heart beating faster than previously
In a deep sleep, I hear a sound foreign to the prancing of sheep
An off-tune creak, in the stillness surrounding me - sense of security seeps
The pounding beat of my chest eases, an open window left for a breeze is...
A tight squeeze but in a breath, one less test the night teased with
"Sweet Jesus", I say - what could be the disturbance felt
I stand up and grab my shotgun, around here its every man for himself
Needed help with my wealth, with my stealthy plan in process...
I tip-toed slow steps so they didnt know I'd broke in thier home yet
Making my way down the steps of my luxurious abode
.20 gauge Shotgun erect and fully prepared to bust its load
Curios and trinkets, stuff I know'll go like the snow in spring...
fill my digits as I rush, bold, in hope they don't expose my sin
I happen upon a thief in the night stealing my life's work
I empty both barrels - missing the robber narrow - spitting curses at this viper
First noise I heard wasnt words, was the click of the sniper...
Shot 1 missed, shot 2 hit an inch to the right, even tighter!
Obscenities fly as mine and the thief's eyes meet for the first time
I'm heated, my mind is steaming, heart rate quick on the incline
He looks pissed, I needed to find a way to escape the Ape
Or should I face the hate, raise the stakes and fight my case
I see him making a run for it, I reload yelling "freeze you punk"
I see him stop in his tracks does he plan to converse or Punch?
In an instant I gripped picked up a 9 iron from the bunch
About to lunge, I shouted 4, then swung for the cunt!
I'm caught off guard by the sneak attack and can't react in time
He catches me hard - I fall dropping the firearm, now woozy and blind
That'll teach ya for tackling crime, next time just claim on insurance
Then you'll be sure things remain without pain endurance
My brain is shaken nervous I scramble to find my shotgun
Murderous thoughts awakened I'll surely see this robber's life done
Not tonight son the fights won, I got what I came for...
Crossed off the main score, maybe another day we can play more
He thinks its a game, I Sharpen aim to bleed this fiends veins
One slug catching his leg, my perfect first kill lie there, wounded and lame
In pain, thigh wide open, broken bones exposed...
But I refuse to die, lose to the guy, I'm supposed to be Pro
This guy doesn't know, my family died in a prior home invasion
I vowed never again, to fall victim to that ill-tinted situation
I draw strength to attempt escaping, but i'm fading fast
clawing at the bench, shaking, the task was too much to ask...
...I collapsed!
I bear down on his cranium with the firearm that I wield
Do I pull the trigger aimed at 'em? Fuck it - its a righteous kill.
A final twitch then i'm lifeless an' still!



[ill get some links edited in today]

[Endeva.]

can we get some feed in here...

[Endeva.]

the activity here's crazy...

[Truth Iscariot]

only 2 users have viewed this, that's bullshit.

[Emily]

I actually mega fed this, then got a pm and what do you know? It all went down the S bend.
I'm so pissed off.

Here is a little of what I said before.

There is so much about this that I love. Not just love, absolutely love.
You guys work well together. The flow of the two people talking is like water off a ducks back.
It meshes. Your rhymes and flow were divine. I loved the wording used. I like the lingo between the two
persons of interest (robber and home owner).
The storyline is interesting because of the conversation going on between the two, being full of colour and personality.
You have some killer lines, but I'm not going to copy and paste them because there are quite a few.
I had a little chuckle about how this collab was done. Was it sent two bars at a time? If so, time consuming but it worked.
To me, it seemed streamline and balanced.
Tech side of things was good. You had vivid imagery, great theme you worked well and never strayed from, had heaps of
internals and lots and lots of beautiful rhymes....PLUS....KILLER FLOWWWWWWWWWW.

Guys, I really liked this. Top job.

Great read.

I'll be putting in a nom for this. Good luck.


ps) lol The Burglary <<<<You've got the spelling of your title wrong.

[Truth Iscariot]

Lol that's that European schooling for you.

thanks Emily, and yes we did it one bar at a time, sending it back and forth

[Emily]

Lol that's that European schooling for you.

thanks Emily, and yes we did it one bar at a time, sending it back and forth

Yeah, of course, I thought so. The mind boggled as to how else it could have been done and ended up
so streamline. Great job.

[Endeva.]

lol just realised the spelling mistake in the title... haha

[KnowP]

Pretty interesting concept overall. Packed with direction and imagery. Ths struggle was real and ending had me thinking someone was going to come in and stop this but someone actually died. you two are terrible. lmao. Good vocab and rhyme schemes. a few were broken and didnt flow well but im sure it did in your native tongues. Overall this was a cool read something we havent seen much of in OM. Creative indeed. Good drop gents.