Punches due Thursday
Voting ends on Sunday
You know the rules, if not, refer to the rule thread.
@RoboCop
Punches due Thursday
Voting ends on Sunday
You know the rules, if not, refer to the rule thread.
@RoboCop
Last edited by Phalanx; November 11th, 2022 at 06:31 PM
This clothesline'll give hime a Take Off vibe, He knows its a homi
Which is ironic, cuz if I disrobe, I'll wind up exposing a body
Been executin folks, & nerd desperately wants in the gang
The suspense killin him
After Robo shows him the ropes.. and lets him hang.
Plottin your demise.
Phal - pretty sure the robe flip has been used on robo last week or the week before however this was executed better although I’m not feeling the set up much
Robo - I like a turn of phrase punchline but feel like the last bit could’ve connected harder
Overall I got this as a tight battle, minus points to Phal for an approach that has been used in the past week or so and minus points to robo for lacking that killer blow from a nice concept. Overall I think Phas was slightly nastier but could go either way good battle lads
V/phal
- - - Updated - - -
Phal - pretty sure the robe flip has been used on robo last week or the week before however this was executed better although I’m not feeling the set up much
Robo - I like a turn of phrase punchline but feel like the last bit could’ve connected harder
Overall I got this as a tight battle, minus points to Phal for an approach that has been used in the past week or so and minus points to robo for lacking that killer blow from a nice concept. Overall I think Phas was slightly nastier but could go either way good battle lads
V/phal
phal- very fire, well done. good wording, good concept, best bar i've read since back on RB, gj.
robo- suspense killing him/show him the ropes/let him hang is all kinda whatever, the connection lacks real power imo. the concept is ok it just isn't hitting that hard for me.
v/ phal in a landslide here
Robo had an ok punch but no wow factor
Phal had a very good punch and takes this pretty easily
v/ phal
so Robo followed the same syntax as previous week and I think that hurt him.. basically it made the bar really predictable so it didn't have any powerful impact to me. the concept is ok but it could have been harsher. If it had been worded differently this would be a banger
phal's, pretty good bar. I dig the execution, it was simple and effective. it was pretty dark too, love it. rhyme scheme was a bit off but it balances at the end.
good stuff
v phalanx
Jiminy jillikers this was a close one.
Phal - I liked the links with clothesline, Takeoff & disrobe. I'm not a fan of current events bars but as an added bit of spice rather than the meat of the punch I rate it. Think the disrobe wordplay was ok although it has been done recently in 1-2. The "I'll wind up exposing a body" fell short of your usual standard, think it's the "exposing a body" bit that was missing that solidarity. It did rhyme well & was tailored which are both important when it's this close.
Robocop - liked the suspense killing him, shows him the ropes idea, reminds me of a punch I read a while ago, something about someone getting married then "I'll help you tie the knot, before kicking the chairs from under you". Anyway, I think everything worked ok but the rhyming took some sting out of the punch, "in the gang" & "lets him hang" doesn't multi in my accent but I'm not sure if it does in other accents, I can kind of hear someone like Roc saying let sounding like lit. Overall I liked the concept more than Phal's and the wording was better, but it wasn't tailored and didn't rhyme as well.
I can't actually find a clear separation anywhere so going to have to call a draw.
Phal had a cool wp/np with everything connecting well
Seen a fair amount of "Show you the ropes" idiom concepts over the years
Phal won
"Sound stuff out guys" - Barcotic
Phalanx wins 6-1.