freestyle

[levidicus]

see a red beam blast your hoel team /and have all drop on they nees/asking for peace but the only peace you getin is the peace to your cheek/have you on street licing from your head to your feet /next to your peips /and i can tell you week the type to cry in a cell just for getin bagged for weed/the badiest is me

[pot1ent]

This was um.. wack.. Trying using some better vocab, some more complex rhymes, maybe also actually have a hint of meaning behind your lines, and make them longer, < thats just the amount for you not to be classed as the biggest herb ever..

[....BaSh....]

Originally posted by levidicus
see a red beam blast your hoel team /and have all drop on they nees/asking for peace but the only peace you getin is the peace to your cheek/have you on street licing from your head to your feet /next to your peips /and i can tell you week the type to cry in a cell just for getin bagged for weed/the badiest is me

you need to elevate dawg

[Dappa Rappa]

I no im new and i dont mean to give orders but.................... put ur lyrics into lines instead of one thing after another....................................... Peace!

[Explict]

work on ya flow dawg.. use vocab,complexity,creativity, imagry..
overall you need to elvate dawg..

check my open mic's

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...threadid=95506


http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...threadid=95629

[Prez]

too short , develop it a little more n use more varied vocab

[Maven.]

you have to reply to three other open mics, and post links to your replies in this thread, or it gets deleted.
thanks.

[Jo-JO]

this isn't a freestyle forum dog go somewhere else I think you have skill so go ahead use ur head and do some type of structure and a better more complex rhyme scheme. pz and luv